What is unconditional love

By communicating with your partner , you show your respect and commitment to working through challenges and finding ways to meet conflicting goals.

For better communication :. Things will get easier with practice. When your partner struggles, you listen with empathy or offer a helping hand, and they do the same for you. A time may come when you find yourself sacrificing something for their benefit, but sacrifice and support should go both ways. Unconditional love might sound like a dream come true. But while love is one thing, a relationship is quite another. A healthy relationship does have conditions, of a sort: your boundaries.

Crystal Raypole has previously worked as a writer and editor for GoodTherapy. Her fields of interest include Asian languages and literature, Japanese translation, cooking, natural sciences, sex positivity, and mental health. They say love works in mysterious ways, but things start to make a lot more sense when you look at its effects on your mind and body. Most people want a healthy relationship, but what does that really mean? Communication in relationships is so important, but especially when one of you is living with chronic illness.

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What it is. Is it even possible? Fostering it in your relationship. The bottom line. Read this next. Medically reviewed by Janet Brito, Ph. What Makes a Relationship Healthy? Without these things, you might not love them, and there is certainly an expectation to provide a level of good friendship back," Laura explains. However, with unconditional love, you love the other person no matter what you receive in return. So how can you tell if you really love someone unconditionally?

According to Jayne, one sign is knowing that your love for the other person will remain "unchanged", despite any of their flaws or shortcomings. On the flip side, if someone loves you unconditionally, you'll feel loved without any expectation to reciprocate the other person's actions, Laura explains. If you're unsure, you can test out how you feel about someone by imagining them without the attributes that first attracted you to them - and seeing whether you'd still love them.

A huge way to do this is by supporting your partner through their failures and mistakes, as well as their successes. As to how to actually achieve this, Laura suggests: "talking more openly about how you really feel; being non-judgemental when your partner is sharing their thoughts and feelings; and keeping an open mind when you talk to your partner. Although unconditional love can mean accepting your partner's failures, mistakes and shortcomings, it's important to make sure that so-called 'unconditional love' doesn't cross over into what Jayne calls "blanket tolerance" of unhealthy or toxic behaviour.

In reality, a healthy relationship needs conditions and boundaries in order to stay healthy. Find out more about sex therapy app Blueheart here. Relate provides relationship counselling to couples, families and individuals. It can sound like many things from stark remarks to subtle and insidious comments:. These boundaries define the space you take in this world. Specifically, they define the space where you end and another person begins. You can think of them as your soul boundaries, spirit boundaries, mental health boundaries, or physical personal space boundaries — anything that reinforces your own well being.

Different people in different situations will have different types of boundaries. This will help you in maintaining new boundaries with others and in respecting new boundaries others may establish over time.

To begin narrowing down your own boundaries, you can do a self-check on the following specific boundary examples:. The healthiest boundaries are those that are communicated clearly and maintained despite any initial or continued backlash. Whatever thoughts arise while reviewing it can become your starting place for setting boundaries in loving relationships.

Knowing what people are and are not comfortable with upfront saves time later in miscommunications, misunderstandings, and missteps over boundaries. For example, you may want to know if someone, in turn, is only comfortable in an open or polyamorous relationship.

Boundary backlash happens because setting boundaries requires changing — and many people are resistant or hesitant to changing for a million reasons including emotions like fear and anxiety and self-limiting beliefs and behavior patterns. While the other person may very well be impressed and intimidated by your emotional strength and commitment to your best interests, they may not express this as such.

Instead, they may express negative emotions. Yes, you may lose a few people who just will not be able to accept your healthy boundaries because they cannot set and maintain their own.

It may sound harsh, but losing these people is ultimately much healthier than losing your voice and constantly having your boundaries crossed, ignored, or otherwise disrespected. Cut the cords and let yourself move to find the unconditional love we all desire and deserve.

If these are irreplaceable people in your life, you may want to consider talking to them about boundaries before deciding to end the relationship. If you need help, you can start by reviewing this common list of healthy boundaries and considering where your relationship with this person stands. In your relationship, do you both :. With these boundaries in place, you can release yourself to love freely without hidden costs and fears that lead people to create unhealthy attachments, jealousies, and confines around relationships in the first place.

The longer answer is that several small studies support that unconditional love is healthy, but in order to understand what that really means, we need to look at how these studies actually define unconditional love. In most cases, unconditional love is measured by nurturing behaviors, affection, and emotional warmth. Unconditional love can provide a secure foundation for children to learn because they feel supported if they make mistakes which we all do.

As we age, this type of love provides a beautiful opportunity for people to become their full selves without worry of abandonment and to experience a sense of security unmatched in relationships where people keep scores. While unconditional love is a healthy and mature feeling, in some worst case scenarios, some people can use it in very unhealthy ways to gain control and power.

Addressing your relationship with love may not feel easy, but it does lead to personal transformation, an increase in self esteem , and even the possibility of a greater sense of self love. Look inward! Michelle Pugle is an expert health writer, author, and advocate who was first published in her preteens for writing about depression.